I bet my dad is cooler

Thanks to Awesomeology.

Hulkster mixes up God and Angel of Death

What happens if you don't train, say your prayers and eat your vitamins? You become a vegetable at the hands of God.

So says Hulk Hogan.

While crash victim John Graziano lies in a permanent vegetative state in a hospital with a hole in his head, Hulk Hogan says that God laid some "heavy s**t"on him because of things that he was "into." Nick agrees, saying John was a "negative person."

What was the kid into? Drugs? Like which kind? The bad kind, like cocaine, which ruins your life or the good kind, like painkillers and steriods, that make you a national icon?

If only poor John were more positive. He could have encouraged Nick to drive a little faster, win the illegal street race, and avoid the accident that ruined his life.

Hogan has something else to thank God for; the Internet came well after his wrestling heyday because it would be impossible to make Hogan 'a face' when it would have to be attached to his drug-taking, wife cheating, cradle-robbing, saggy-titted body.

Dig it, brother.

HHR Hugs It Out [5.23.08]

• Brand New Form Of Child Abuse (The Money Shot)
• Hot Chicks with Lord Stanley (The World of Isaac)
• ESPN First Take Tackles Huge Philisophical Question: Bears (Legend of Cecilio Guante)
• NHL Seizes The Moment While Hockey And Soccer Abroad Grab The Spotlight… (Sports Marketing & PR Roundup)
• Any Opportunity to Promote "Timeshare Tommy" is an Opportunity We'll Jump at (The 700 Level)
• Dear John Paxon (SimononSports via Epic Carnival)
• Is the MSM Really That Different From Blogs? (Sportaphile)
  

Today on Gem Mint Ten:

• Foghat, Spectrum, 1976

Happy Memorial Day weekend. Remember our fallen heroes and thank a serviceman or woman this weekend.

The Circle of Life

Yesterday, we were ecstatic to hear about the St. Paul Saints' clever upcoming promotion, the Larry Craig Bobblefoot giveaway.

Unfortunately, just as this promotion was born, we got wind (albeit late) that another passed away. We decided that this would be a good time to check the status of the Macon Music "Eliot Spitzer Night" scheduled for June 13, only to learn that it died a silent death back in March.

The team’s website poll results show that 55% of fans voting were in favor of canceling the event. Another poll featured on the Macon Telegraph’s website had similar results.

The Music team wanted to give its fans the chance to voice their opinion on a promotion that has caused quite a stir. The local fans support is very important and with that in mind, the team respectfully has canceled the event.

We applaud the Saints for their innovative and media-grabbing promotion and the effort by the Music to be equally creative. But we understand while some people would be uncomfortable with the idea(s).

We do, however, still offer our deal to Music fans.

HHR will offer a free weekly guest post throughout the Music's season to recap Macon games on our site to any fan who send us a picture of themselves wearing our Spitzer #9 baseball jersey at Luther Williams Field.

Click Here to Order!

Piazza, New York Catcher

Photo: mlb.com

Or: How do I know you're gay? Because two hipsters insinuated so.

I'm not, nor have I ever been a fan, of Mike Piazza. But I've never hated the guy either, nor have I ever put much credence or thought into the rumors that have followed him throughout his career regarding his sexuality.

Another thing I've never been is a fan of is hippy jam sessions. Foolishly, I purchased the Juno soundtrack a few months back, if for nothing else than the Mott the Hoople track, which, until the purchase, I only had on vinyl.

I really hadn't listened to it until yesterday. Not knowing the song or artist I was actually listening to, I heard the words:

San Francisco’s calling us, the Giants and Mets will play
Piazza, New York catcher, are you straight or are you gay?

My immediate reaction was "WTF was that?"

I look down at my iPod and see a song titled "Piazza, New York Catcher" by some duo calling themselves Belle & Sebastian.

My second thought is, "Why is this guy so hated?"

Sure he had Elton John's arm and Freddie Mercury's 'stache, but he hit as well as any catcher who ever played.

He was a Rookie of the Year, 12-time All-Star and 10-time Silver Slugger. What fan wouldn't want him on their team? There is no argument on whether or not he is a Hall of Famer. And the real debate shouldn't be on what hat he should wear, but rather why his sexuality now outweighs his performance as the greatest hitting catcher who ever played.

The joke's so old that it's not even funny anymore.

Paul Lukas, a writer who we greatly enjoy, posted an article on ESPN this week titled "Good riddance, Mike Piazza," primarily citing Piazza's selfishness and failure to advocate for gay rights.

Mike Piazza is a baseball player who did what he was paid to do by organizations willing to pay him for his services as a catcher. Simple supply and demand. He offered his goods and teams paid for his services. How is that different than any other athlete? That's all they are - commodities. Maybe some of us would like them to be social advocates or more team-minded, but for a "career" that spans (in Piazza's case) only 15-years, why should we ask or expect more out of them? Would Piazza have done anything different for the fans he played for especially now when they are so quick to brush him away? Why would or should any of them?

We should judge our athletes on what they do on the field, and we have a right to criticize them for what they do off of it. Ultimately, fan opinion will shape athletes' legacies. Whether they be Pete Rose and Jose Canseco or Mike Piazza. Unfortunately, Rose and Canseco's on-field accomplishments are greatly overshadowed by their extra-curricular shenanigans. Piazza deserves better. Because, really, his off-field shenanigans don't even exist. Yet, they are the first thing online pundits point to.

Are You F*ckig Kidding Her?

Yesterday some readers tipped us off on some fantastic tennis sites that we wanted to share.

The first is dedicated to players going off on the man in the lifeguard chair, "TheUmpIsAlwaysRight.com."

We give you the great Maria Sharapova in all her grunting and cursing glory...



The second echoes what we talked about yesterday with tennis embracing online technology. Recently, HHR signed up for Twitter, after hearing raves about it from friends of ours that are users. While we ourselves are still getting used to its usage, tennis fans have taken it to a new and likely unprecedented level with Twennis.com which is "aggregating all the conversations by Twitter-ers talking about Tennis" according to reader Julia Roy.

For those of you unaware of what Twitter is, it is essentially a mini blog, in which users can send and receive mini updates via web-messaging or phone based-texting services.

This week's The Sporting News pointed out that Jazz PG Deron Williams has his own Twitter feed, in which he can give fans bite-sized updates rather than sit and compile full-length blog posts.

In addition to HHR, some other sports blogs such as Sportaphile, NESW , Signal to Noise, The Jets Blog and The 700 Level have their own feeds to keep on-the-go readers up to date.

Again, it's refreshing to see Tennis out in front on mobilizing and allowing interaction among fans. Hopefully more sports, and athletes for that matter, will follow.

Getting on my soap box

This gradual evolution of organized sports into glorified games of patty-cake has to end.

In a District All-Star game when I was 14 years old, I watched the center fielder for the opposing team drift towards the fence tracking a towering fly ball, turn back at the last minute, and smash choppers first into a metal fence. There was nothing anyone could do to avoid that situation. There will always be danger involved in sports, whether it's with an aluminum bat, wooden bat, or a swimming noodle.

At least some people understand that games and competition are important to young adults.

This year marks the 52nd anniversary of the Bucks County, Pa Soap Box Derby.

I am sure there are rules and regulations and safety precautions involved, but at its core is kids in a box on wheels racing down steep hills at decent rates of speed.

“It's just a lot of fun for everyone involved,” spokesman Ed Preston said. “It's a great way to spend so much time with your kids and it's so enjoyable.”

Isn't that what sports are about? Kids having fun?

All sports involve some level of danger. Kids will get hurt. You can only teach proper safety and technique and hope for the best outcome. The more you change the rules, take away the competition, and litter the field with pillows and packing peanuts for optimal safety conditions, the more it will turn them off sports. And doesn't anyone ever notice the most popular sports video games are the ones that would involve the most danger in real life? That can't be coincidence.

Good luck and safe racing to all the competitors this weekend. Just a word of warning to the kids involved though; don't take any unneccesary risks and for God's sake don't make it seem like you are having too much fun. Someone will catch wind of it and next year you'll be sitting on a stool in the street and imagining yourself racing.

HHR Hugs It Out [8.22.08]

• Top 10 Views You Wont Hear About Jason Taylor & the Phins (Five Tool Tool via Epic Carnival)
• Cris Carter Phone Convo With Leitch (Kissing Suzy Kolber)
• The Mets Suck (Bugs & Cranks)
• If Indiana Jones Characters Were MLBers (The Big Picture)
• On the DL talks to Glen Macnow (On the DL)

Today at Gem Mint Ten:

• GMT Hall of Fame Inductee: Rance Mulliniks

St. Paul Saints Offering "Larry Craig Bobblefoot" Giveaway

Pure genius.

The first 2500 fans attending the St. Paul Saints' game against the Fort Worth Cats, May 25 will received one of these collector's pieces commemorating Sen. Larry Craig's run-in with an officer at the Minneapolis-St.Paul airport last year.

AP Photo

Coincidentally, the Saints' schedule lists the 25th as "Day of the Week Sponsor: Underwater Adventures Family Sunday. Kids run the bases and get autographs from Saints players!"

Nice.

Tennis Connects With Digital Age

Fellow BallHyper apalmer7 passed along a tip noting that TennisChannel.com is offering (free?) live streaming of the French Open from May 25-June 8.

Some of you may have caught Blogging Ambassador Will Leitch's article in the April 2008 issue of Fast Company Magazine, "MLB's Digital Dominance." The article highlighted the success of MLB Advanced Media and its overall impact on the sport's bottom line.

A side bar in the print issue looked at the steps taken by each of the "big four" (baseball, football, hoops & hockey) to integrate online technology into their overall business strategies.

With that in mind, the TennisChannel's online foray is a great step for any sport, namely the minor/individual ones who clamor for the exposure of an MLB or NFL. Continued exploration into online media can not only help boost the sport's revenue, but also help expand its fan base, with seemingly little risk.

My first impression on such advancement was when contributer Rusty had us over a few years ago for the Daytona 500 and had his lap top (via NASCAR.com, I believe) tuned in to Dale Jr.'s pitcrew/car communications. To me - a non-NASACR fan - this was amazing. It held me captivated for hours. The following week when I tried watching a race on my own. I made it about 5 minutes until I had to shut'er down.

Will the TennisChannel's streaming make me an overnight tennis fan? Unlikely. But it provides fans additional access to matches and might pull in an extra few casual fans to catch some action. For sports nuts stuck in cubicals all day, who wouldn't give it a shot?