Sunday, January 27, 2008

Shaq: By the numbers

Shaq will go down as one of the top 5 players of all time. Not much to argue. His career stats are impressive. I am more impressed with these numbers...

From today's NY Post gossip section:
An accounting document in the divorce file of Shaq and his wife, Shaunie, obtained by The Palm Beach Post, reveals the Miami Heat star has a routine monthly payout of $875,015 - including $156,116 for mortgages on three homes, $3,345 in phone bills, $1,610 in lawn and pool maintenance, $12,775 for food, $10,065 for electricity, $1,495 for cable TV, $24,300 for gas, $6,730 for dry cleaning, $17,220 for clothing, $2,305 for pets and $110,505 for vacations.

$24,000 in gas? $1,500 in cable bills? Those knees have maybe a season left in them. He better start mapping out a retirement plan if he wants to keep up this lifestyle. I am calling for an acting comeback.

Kazaam 2- Shaq uses his genie powers to make his ex-wife disappear
Blue Chips 2- Spends weekends on campuses of top schools, then skips school and goes straight to the NBA. Needs at least one naked party scene. Shaq not involved.
Steal 2- Uses his suit of armor to rob banks to pay alimony
Scary Movie (whatever they are on)- no need to make a joke, there will be another, he should just sign on.

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