Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Game On: Iron Ref Round 10 - Hot Streak

Welcome to the final "regular season" installment of Iron Ref 2008. We've got three takes on this week's sizzling theme. Let's get to the good stuff.

The Secret Ingredient is: HOT STREAK

Remember to vote for your favorite in the comments.

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Stanley Cup of Chowder

If you asked a group of people to explain the term “hot streak”, you would probably get a bunch of different responses. Most would probably talk about great athletic achievements like John Wooden’s UCLA Bruins and their 88 game win streak or Joe DiMaggio’s 56 game hit streak in 1941. Some would bore you with unnecessarily long stories about beer pong or blackjack. Some might tell you about the time back in college when they convinced some drunken sorority chick to streak naked across campus. Others might even wax philosophical about the red comet tail of Fox’s glow puck. Baseball Hall of Famer George Brett would probably follow you around for 20 minutes trying to tell you about the stains he found in his boxers after hittin’ up an all you can eat taco bar in Vegas.

If you asked someone in their mid to late 20’s about the term “hot streak”, chances are they would immediately bust out their best “He’s on fire!” or “Boomshakalaka!" and take you on a trip down memory lane back to a simpler time. They would tell you about a time when kids were pumping quarters into a new arcade basketball game that seemed to defy all three of Sir Isaac Newton’s Laws of Motion. They would regale you for hours with stories, like the time they got Detlef Schrempf to stay “on fire” for the whole second half or the time that John Stockton actually dunked. I am of course speaking of NBA Jam, the game that truly put the term “hot streak” on the map. Fifteen years after the game’s release, some are still trying to keep the hot streak alive.



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Awful Announcing

Now when most of you think of the term "Hot Streak" in Sports, you probably think of the likes of Joe DiMaggio, Brett Favre or Cal Ripken. I on the other hand liken the term to something more along the lines of a pessimist. See folks, I revel in shadenfreude and there's nothing better than a "Hot Streak" that involves announcers snowballing out of control and then crashing and burning during a broadcast. You may argue that this is not a "Hot Streak" per se, but every good trainwreck is a streak of its own and HHR did not designate this as a negative or positive crusade.

With that said, I'd like to get into one of the greatest "Hot Streaks" in recent memory and that is Mike, Mike and Mike's second turn as the JV team for the MNF late game during week one of the NFL Season. Since I owe every bit of my site to my commenters, and they've always said things much more eloquently than me, here is the breakdown from that fateful night as told by four VERY special Anons…
Welcome to the Broncos/Raiders segment of the liveblog ... doing the play-by-play on ESPN is Mike Greenberg, who is like a more feminine Pam Ward. (From Anon via MJD's live-blog)

This sounds too much like two dudes and a chick talking at a bar. "Ooh he got drilled!" "He got it" "Here he comes" (Via Anon)

Another whisky sour for Mr. Ditka, stat. (Via Anon)

"You remember what happened when Eddie Pipp got hurt. A guy named Lou Gehrig took over."- Mike Ditka (Via Anon)

And that my friends was only the first half. Just think of the "Hot Streak" to come! Oh shit….this was supposed to have something multimedia-like right? Annnnnnnnnnd…….SCENE!!!!


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Real Clear Sports

I am here this week not to share with you a story about hockey, or to show you some new-fangled video, but instead to tell a story we can all relate to: complete and unabashed fandom.

It's no secret that the New England Patriots went on a bit of the Hot Streak last season. But what you don't know is that their success was a direct result of me, and my weekly eating habits.



When the Patriots began the 2007 season at New York, I decided to treat myself to an opening-week meal: a hamburger and Bloomin' Onion from Outback. Like most sports fans, I am (weirdly) superstitious, so when the Pats rolled to a 38-14 victory, I felt I had to repeat the Australian steakhouse order the next week. And the next. And the next.

The Patriots kept winning, and I kept eating roughly a full day's caloric-intake in one sitting. Every Sunday, I made the four-mile drive to my local Outback for their curbside takeaway, ate enough for two, and watched as the Patriots wreaked havoc on the rest of the league.

Sure, there were times when I could practically hear my arteries clogging, but I dared not stop my weekly tradition, for fear that it would cause an end to the Patriots' Hot Streak.

For 16 weeks and into the playoffs, I did my part to help New England attain the status of the best team the NFL had ever seen. When Super Bowl Sunday finally arrived, I chose to leave my comfy condo for a friend's apartment – this game deserved to be seen in 60-inch, high-definition glory.

Sure, I was going to have to sacrifice my weekly Outback ritual, but all the other snacks there would be a fine substitute…right?

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So there you have it. Who will be the last finalist to battle it out for the ultimate prize? Vote in the comments!

63 comments:

Grego said...

Def Ryan for RCS

iamcaleb2 said...

Ryan + RCS. I hear his farts still smell like Outback.

Ethanator1088 said...

Brian Powell wins. Close the voting booth. We have a WINNAH!

Nick said...

Definitely Stanley Cup of Chowder - if not simply for referring to unnecessarily long stories of beer pong prowess, then for posting terrible grainy jackass-esque videos

bma15 said...

Stanley Cup of Chowder all the way

Susan said...

Ryan + RCS!!!

Britini said...

Real Clear Sports...clearly the winner!

Jamie said...

Ryan from RCS! Just because he didn't die of a heart attack...

MMayes said...

I love Awful Announcing, but I have to give the nod to Real Clear Sports, although the Stanley Cup almost got in there for referencing a close encounter with George Brett's shorts.

Wes J said...

hot streaks and white guy basketball dominance appearing in the same paragraph?!? Stanley Cup of Chowder pulled it off.

James said...

if you enjoy funny and have half a brain. you would vote for RCS!!!!!

(note for girls: adjust the above comment to "half a girl sized brain")

jayatmt said...

Stanley cup of Chowder all the way!

thejumbotron said...

Stanley Cup of Chowder all the way

anytime you can get a live action reference for NBA Jam you are doing something right.

Katie said...

Real Clear Sports!! Go Ryan!!! When you win, you should treat yourself to some Outback.

Kevin said...

The reference to Brett's bacon strips did it for me....

STANLEY CUP OF CHOWDER ALL DAY BABY

Mike said...

BOOMSHAKALAKA!

Andrew said...

Stanley Cup of Chowder... NAIL IN THE COFFIN!!!

toasty444 said...

He's starting to heat up....

Stanley cup of chowder definately!

singeracl said...

REALCLEARSPORTS!

RYAN HUDSON IS AWESOME AND HILARIOUS!!!!!

Brian said...

Stanley Cup of Chowder all the way!

Convict said...

RealClearSports.

If nothing else he helped the Pats to lose the Super Bowl in some way.

Robbie said...

Maybe if Stanley Cup had mentioned DJ Jazzy Jeff's appearance in NBA Jam he'd get the nod, but I gotta go with the Fresh Prince - Ryan Hudson of RCS

eljeff10 said...

Gotta go with Ryan and RCS, although I curse him for not getting the onions one last time.

David said...

Ryan. RCS.

Hub Hockey said...

Stanley Cup of Chowder is heating up...

Cornelius Hardenbergh said...

HE'S ON FIRE!

Stanley Cup of Chowder ftw.

westleyc said...

RCS. End of story.

Ric said...

Ryan and RCS...

i hate the patriots but it's def a better story than the other two...

iggylives said...

Ryan Real Clear Sports Go Sox

Geoff said...

Ryan for RCS.

Birdy Fucktard said...

RCS and delicious, delicious meat products.

jennaj said...

Ryan and RCS easily.

SmartyBarrett said...

stanley cup of chowder!! woooooooo!

JP said...

SCoC. Lock.

forem28710 said...

Stanley Cup of Chowder is definitely the "bread bowl" winner. Plus, the blogger is really cute! Teeheehee!

K_Lee said...

my vote is for Stanley Cup of Chowder

eeggs84 said...

I have no idea what this is but someone sent it to me. I started reading it and could not stop laughing at the Stanley Cup of Chowder kid. He wins... what is this even for? Who cares? That guy is awesome! YOUR MY BOY BLUE!

Ed

Linkdead said...

Stanley Cup of Chowder is my favorite

Colbs18 said...

Stanley Cup of Chowder!! Hilarious Boooomshakalaka im still laughing all the wayyyy

PARENTS FORUM said...

STANLEY CUP OF CHOWDER

PARENTS FORUM said...

Stanley Cup of Chowder

Mike said...

Stanley Cup of Chowder! This dude is hilarious!

bma15 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
jaysripper said...

Belie dat!

Stanley cup of chowder!!

Chan said...

Ryan, RCS. I love OUTBACK!

Bryan said...

Not even close ... Real Clear Sports!

Jill said...

Ryan & RCS for his blood sweat and high cholesterol!

Matt said...

Real. Clear. Sports. Ryan. MFin. Hudson.period.

detbarry20 said...

RCS, RCS, RCS, RCS!!!!

detbarry20 said...

RCS RCS RCS RCS RCS!!!!

Sean said...

Stanly, cup of chowder plz.

Faces Media said...

Stanley cup of chowder for Iron Ref!!!!!
no doubt about it!!!

Alexis said...

Stanley Cup of Chowder...going streaking through the quad

Maseman said...

RCS and Ryan, just one more Bloomin Onion and I wouldnt have to have listened to Giants fans for a whole year.

Theresa said...

Gotta go with Ryan & RCS on this one.

Kevin said...

Gotta go with Stanley Cup of Chowder.

Christen said...

Stanley Cup of Chowder

Scott said...

RCS. Because I said so, that's why.

Hazel Maes Landing Strip said...

Stanley Cup of Chowdah

Tom said...

Stanley Cup of Chowder

Babcock said...

Stanley Cup Of Chowder, sick.

Pepster said...

"He's heating up! He's on fire" Stanley CUp for the win.

craigr726 said...

RCS by a mile. I mean, seriously, Chowda, why not just start off your essay the same way I did in third grade- "If you look up 'hot streak' in the dictionary, you'll see it defined as..."