Friday, December 12, 2008

Petition to Stop LeBron James Petitioners

Just stop.


LeBron James is perhaps a once-in-a-lifetime talent, a franchise and league megastar destined to take the Association to new heights.

Fans know this. Players know this. Most of all, teams and NBA executives know this.

Therefore, you must know, NBA fans, that signing your name on a paper or online form will have little effect on your respective teams' desire, willingness and/or ability to sign LBJ.

Yet, you find the unhealthy need to be an activist. We are talking to you, specifically New Yorkers. And you too, Clevelanders (Clevelandites?). And you countless other NBA cities out there.

For who? For what?

That said, we implore you, HHR Nation and disgusted fans everywhere to join your collective voices in calling for an end to such infantile and pointless petitioning by clicking the link and signing the petition below.

It's your patriotic duty.

To: NBA Fans Nationwide

Whereas, LeBron James is being heralded as not only the most attractive free agent in sports history once he hits the market following the 2010 season, but also as the savior of the free world, re-builder of dreams for hoops fans across the country, eradicator of global hunger and poverty, and cure-all for every disease known to man; and

Whereas, the prospect of having James come to respective fans' franchise of choice has caused moistened panties in NBA cities throughout the land; and

Whereas, Cleveland fans have pinned their future existance on the hopes of LBJ resigning with the Cavs; and

Whereas, New Yorkers have made it their life's purpose to woo the guard to the Big Apple; and

Whereas, petitions to lobby NBA executives to sign LBJ to their teams have sprung up from New York to Cleveland to Kalamazoo,

We therefore call upon fans to join voices in petitioning petitioners to grow up, stop wasting their time, get a life and stop creating petitions regarding the signing of LeBron James.


The Undersigned


JRod said...

I am going to have to disagree. Who knows what good signing a petition or putting up a website will do, but the one trump card Cleveland has in their quest for LeBron is the unconditional love and support they can give him as his hometown fans. No amount of money in NY can replicate that.

Cleveland fans better mobilize now, because they need to use the next year and half to put the full court press on their King to stay.

Hugging Harold Reynolds said...

I have to respectfully disagree with your disagreement. Of course Cleveland loves him unconditionally - who do they need to convince of that through a petition (other than maybe themselves to say they "did something")?

If you saw the link in the post, NY fans have petitions of their own. If petitions are so powerful as you imply, won't the NY petition trump the Cleveland one?

DP@WFNY said...

Two things:

1) JRod, the Cavs can offer him more money than the NY teams can. Viva la CBA!!

2) He's technically a forward, not a guard. :-)

Hugging Harold Reynolds said...