Thursday, September 17, 2009

D.C. BUREAU EXCLUSIVE Special Investigative Report: Mark Grace=Life Coach

Ol' Blue apologizes for the lack of posts recently, but he's been in the field (figuratively) investigating a hot lead all over Interstate 55.

A couple of weeks ago Blue received a forwarded email from an unnamed source in the St. Louis area wherein the source claimed he (literally) just met this hot cougarlicious bartender who claims to have been (literally) getting it on with the immortal Cub legend Mark Grace pretty much every time he's come to town for the past several years.

Now, we know bartenders of the sexy/skanky variety tend to play to the crowd to gain that extra 50 cent tip (Money saving advice: open a tab, so you can sign out quickly, leave zero tip and run out the door and never return). So, using the natural sense of skepticism ingrained in only the finest journalists, I was umm skeptical? So I asked him for some proof and he sent be the below picture.


Yes, you've read it right the tramp's stamp (literally) reads "Grace".

I was blown away (figuratively).

I probed the source further (again figuratively) to determine whether or not he was jerking me around (not literally, figuratively) and I asked him how do I know her name is not Grace? He replied "she said that she wants every guy who (literally) "does her from the back" to know who she really (figuratively?) belongs to, Mark Grace."

Impressed, but still skeptical, I asked for further proof until he sent me a follow-up email last night.

From Gracie's agent (Barry) last night (the email chain I'm on was eventually forwarded to Grace's agent, Barry Axelrod for confirmation).

"Fellas: Just had a late lunch with Gracie and brought a print out of the narrative with me. I told him that he had been subject of an email chain and I was going to read it to him. As soon as I got to the part mentioning the (Bar name redacted), he just smiled and said “Oh, yeah. The tatoo” I didn’t even get to the meat of it.

He asked me where this came from and I gave him the whole chain and all he wanted was for me to be sure to let you guys know that he does not recall asking her to marry him .. .. .. .. but upon further inquiry he admitted that he could have."

Mark Grace is now my favorite all time baseball player and role model. I'm off to find a slump-buster.

Your boy,
Blue

Story...


Agent's confirmation...


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6 comments:

Vent said...

Yet another great moment from the career of Gracie.

Kudos for the get.

Benny said...

that is just brilliant investigative journalism

Shop Zip said...

so mysterious yet awesome!

Bob Mantz, Jr. said...

Under the shown tat it continues, "The Lord is with Thee..."

J said...

Under "Grace" -- isn't that a caricature of Harry Caray?

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Good luck and happy savings!