No Snitch: Obama Retweets 'Melo

Screencap via Politico

Ben Smith of Politico flags an interesting tweet from the leader of the free world. Apparently, President Barack Obama is a big fan of the Nuggets superstar and the feeling is mutual.

Anthony tweeted out a solicitation from Obama's campaign organization, but as a charter member of team no-snitchin', this analyst sees this snitch of admiration as a likely violation of the no-snitchin' pact and plans to alert the proper authorities.

Curious to know whether Obama chucked his Nobel Peace Prize in the Potomac like 'melo chucked his 'big penny' (Olympic bronze from '04) in 'the lake'.

-Blue Pulaski, HHR's Director of Snitchin' Operations

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Denver Nuggets Sign Corey Miller

In an unexpected move, the Denver Nuggets signed Corey Miller to one year deal. Miller is a well renown tattoo artist from Los Angeles.

"We were having tardiness and pain management issues this year," said Coach George Karl. "After looking at and talking with the players, it was obvious the problems stemmed from their penchant for body art."

GM Warkentien confirmed that the team hired an in-house tattoo artist.

"It a logical function for the team to provide," said Warkentien. "We hire medical personel, we might as well have them work in conjunction with artist to prevent infections and manage the pain. They both have passion for the body."

A visit to the locker room showed that the players were almost giddy with anticipation for the new member of the team.

"I need to feed my children" pronounced Kenyon Martin. "It was about time that they thought of this so I can provide for my family rather than pay exorbitant money to exercise my right to perfect my neck."

Miller was unavailable for comment, but a spokesman said that he was happy to join the team and is prepared for the rigorous grind of the NBA season.

Publicly released portions of the contract show that he will be paid the league minimum with performance bonuses including reductions in tardiness of players, cleaning up Chris Andersen and a per dragon stipend. He will also be able to perform on opposing players while on the road.

-Posted by C.R. Dunbar

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AI's Return Not All Warm & Fuzzy

Despite the thunderous ovation for the return of Allen Iverson to the City of Brotherly Love, not all fans were happy to see the All-Star guard back at the Wachovia Center. Or at least the weren't happy to see his mother.

According to ESPN's Chris Sheridan, some fans took to heckling Mrs. AI, which lead to an altercation followed by a "very large, very angry man" being ejected:

It was a night when Iverson played for the present but opened up about the past, expressing his regret and embarrassment over some of the episodes that discolored his 10-plus years in Philadelphia. And the night included a little extracurricular Iverson-related excitement, too, as a scuffle broke out involving Iverson's friends who were sitting along the second row of the baseline seats near the Denver bench.

The altercation appeared to begin when someone pushed or jostled Iverson's mother as the game was in its final minute and the entire sellout crowd was on its feet. Iverson's friends refused security guards' orders to leave the arena after the fight, which resulted in one very large, very angry man being escorted away with a very large tear in his shirt. But it was all over in time for Iverson's friends to see him get a chance to tie the game or win it.

Lesson learned. You want to get rid of AI's posse, you heckle AI's mommy.

4 fkngw/mypeeps

Photo: Jesse D. Garrabrant/NBAE via Getty Images via 700 Level

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