Friday, March 5, 2010

You'll have to pry the bat from my cold, dead hands

Chico's Bail Bonds beware, if they won't let a gun shop sponsor a team your "get a criminal out on bail" business might not be asked to the next team banquet.

"Carmel, a licensed gun dealer, applied to sponsor a team in the local Babe Ruth/Cal Ripken baseball league, using the name of his business — Constitution Arms. He was rebuffed."

This is a brilliant marketing plan. Carmel sees the potential future buyer named Joey, the crappy right fielder. He is staring at those signs all inning, missing fly balls and still sniffling about the atomic cameltoe in the dugout before the game.

"Kate Schmidt, deputy director of The Baird, South Orange’s recreation agency, said the rule book for the Trenton-based Babe Ruth/Cal Ripken league "strongly advises meticulous care" in the selection of sponsors for the "welfare of youth." But, Carmel notes, other sponsors could be deemed "inappropriate" as well. The league overseers, he said, have permitted sellers of liquor and tobacco, as well as a Cluck-U Chicken eatery whose promos feature a scantily clad woman in a bikini with the suggestive words "Large Breasts, Juicy Thighs. Luscious Legs."

No wonder Joey keeps missing fly balls, his free hand is down his pants.

If only all NJ baseball teams were as meticulous in regard to the people allowed to coach the actual teams.

N.J. kids baseball league rejects Maplewood gun dealer's sponsorship (

1 comment:

FFL123 Blog said...

To get your federal firearm dealer's license you have to have a clean criminal record. Thanks.

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