CoooooSTANZA

Finding new things to write about for a sports blog is not easy. There are thousands of sites dedicated to teams, players, mascots, and even fans. Finding a new angle is rough especially with three major sports in their offseason. Oh and hockey.

So I waste time browsing YouTube looking for ideas. One clip leads to another and I come across this gem.



This man will eventually become the Assistant to the Traveling Secretary for the New York Yankees. So, it’s sports related.

I have so many questions…

> Was soggy lettuce and tomato really an issue with hamburgers? What the hell is a lettuce and tomato hamburger anyway? Since when do you say toppings first? Has anyone ever ordered it like that? If so, they deserve a finger poke to the larynx for it. It’s a hamburger WITH lettuce and tomato.

>Was this before or after the rumble with the Sharks and the Jets?

>Did people really dress like that? I must have blocked it all out or maybe the colors caused a temporary blindness I have yet to fully recover from. The colors are so bright.

>Think those huge McDLT Styrofoam containers have decomposed yet? Ask the kid living next to the landfill where they are all buried, but speak up, the third ear is just for show.

>“HEY! You say you are tired of lettuce and tomato hamburgers in the town?”
“Um, no, we were just walking to work. But stop nosing in on our conversation you troll.”

>A wig? A hairpiece? Extensions? His real hair? I’d believe any of those answers until I found this on Alexander's IMDB page.
Started losing his hair at the age of 16.
That eliminates real hair. I say most is real, the rest is a piece.

This crowd is only dancing because they haven’t actually eaten the burger yet. Give them a half hour and they will feel more bloated then Anna Nicole on the final plane ride to the Bahamas. (To soon?) Three hours later comes the dance to the bathroom to celebrate the McBM.

- posted by Fat Willard