This bold statement was a proudly worn T-Shirt boastfully displayed weekly on “Beer Pong Night” at the dingy basement on Redoaks Avenue by alcohol and lady enthusiast, “The Mush.”
When someone would inquire, “Mush, how do you stop plate tectonics?” he would proudly cackle “YOU CAN’T…JUST LIKE YOU CAN’T STOP ME IN BEER PONG!”
(Of course, no one actually knew what the hell plate tectonics were).
What does this have to do with anything?
This morning, the emails, phone calls and back slaps poured in. “Way to go, Ren.” “Congrats on 10,000.”
What can I say? It was inevitable. Like plate tectonics, nothing short of Armageddon could have prevented it.
Like all other negative Philly sports stigmatisms, the best thing to do as a Phan is to simply embrace it. Take it from Rob in Swingers, “It's like manifest destiny, don't tell me we didn't make it, we made it. We are here, and everything that has passed is prologue to this. All of the sh*t that didn't kill us is only... you know, all that sh*t. You're gonna get over it.”
-posted by Ren McCormack
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