Lamell McMorris, a spokesman for the WUA said, "Major League Baseball's security staff is essentially defaming umpires in their communities by conducting, strange, surreptitious and poorly-executed investigations resembling that of secret police in some despotic nation."
Among the investigators' "strange" inquisitions noted by the WUA, "neighbors of Greg Gibson and Sam Holbrook -- MLB umpires who live in Northern Kentucky -- were asked if the two men are members of the Ku Klux Klan."
In addition to eye tests, word is MLB will soon be using a Barcelona-based PI team to go into synagogues and weed out and convert Jewish umps.
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