Say It Ain't So: JSF Exclusive Video - Softball Guy Confesses

An Exclusive, Emotional Interview with Softball Guy from JoeSportsFan.com on Vimeo.

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1977: The Year of the Pro Slo-Pitch Player

The 70's was a different era. It was a time when a man was a man, and wasn't afraid to flaunt his masculinity.

It was also a time of cockamamie ideas as evidenced by the short-lived and ill-fated American Professional Slo-Pitch League - a startup founded by a gentleman named Bill Bryne that featured a dozen teams, including the manly Pittsburgh Hardhats, Kentucky Bourbons, and perhaps the toughest team of all, the Minnesota Goofy's.

Because I own it, and feel an obligation to share it with loyal HHR readers, I've reached deep into the vault and present you with some excerpts of one of my prized collectables, the 1977 "FIRST ISSUE collector's edition" Pro Softball magazine.




And so, thanks to the wonders of the Internets, the legends of Boom Boom Hutcherson, Candy Man Dillard and Big Dale Palm will live forever, even if the league didn't.

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Have You Gotten Your BlogsWithBalls Tickets Yet?

Softball Player Pulls Aaron Rowand

Except she doesn't break her nose and fails to make the catch. Matter of fact, it seems she was nowhere even close to making a play on the ball.

National Fast Pitch's "Shanel Scott tries to make the catch. Just obliterates the wall."

Meanwhile, the announcer describes Team USA slugger Crystal Bustos (who hit the bomb) as though she was Ryan Howard: "What is so impressive about Crystal Bustos is the pitch prior she is completely fooled on an off-speed. She almost spins herself around. Then she takes the next pitch and just drives it out of the ballpark."

Really? I Mean, Really?

In the late 70's and early 80's, I understand that some exploitative genius figured he could milk has-beens and never-would-bes everywhere who were trying to hold on to their quickly fading youth, with the idea of a professional slo-pitch softball league. No doubt, cocaine had a big influence in this venture.

The American Professional Slow Pitch League (APSPL, 1977-1980), the North American Softball League (NASL, 1980) and the United Professional Softball League (UPSL, 1981-1982) came and went without anyone even noticing.

Fast forward 30 years and this coke and beer-induced dream apparently is close to being realized.

How do I know?

I was half asleep when some ham and egger referring to himself as "Wally Balls" signed off of a national softball television program with (I suppose his catchphrase) "Balls, out."

I woke up assuming I had dreamed the whole thing.

Unfortunately, I didn't.

WorldSoftballLeague.com is the home of Softball 360, which "is broadcast in 70 million homes every summer, highlighting all of the hot topics in the softball from coast to coast."

You read that right.

I enjoy softball as much as any late 20-year-old-to-balding middle-ager. But I ask you. Who the hell would watch such a thing?

Photo: dogpoundsoftball.com

Speedster CA-L Does It Again

Yesterday, HHR's favorite pinch runner, Clarissa Andorfer-Lopez, was substituted into the game to display her base-running prowess and help #3 Arizona State upset #1 Alabama and secure a spot in the WCWS championship.

Well done.

CA-L Update

Yesterday, Clarissa Andorfer-Lopez pinch ran in helping 5th seed Arizona State overcome UCLA in their Women's College World Series match up. The win puts the Sun Devils one win away from the WCWS best-of-3 championship series.

Go ASU!

Meet HHR's favorite college softball player - Clarissa Andorfer-Lopez.

A smart, salsa-dancing, God-fearing Sun Devil. Bless her heart.

Video of Nats Acting Like "Softball Girls"

Nelson Figueroa after a 10-4 loss to the Nats said: "They were cheerleading in the dugout like a bunch of softball girls. If that's what a last-place team needs to do to fire themselves up, so be it. They need to show a little more class and professionalism."

Looking at this footage of Lastings Milledge, Paul LoDuca, Dimiti Young and company, we can't say we disagree. While girls just want to have fun, there is no place for this in professional baseball.

Move Over Bo Kunkle: College Softball Star Also Looking for a Shot at Love

Bo Kunkle isn't the only former jock/coach vying for Tila Tequila's love.

Another is Dumont, NJ and former Ramapo college softball standout Lisa Rizzo (left).

Interestingly, according to a Ramapo Record feature on her as a graduating star catcher, states:

As for the future, Rizzo has some plans.

“I’d like to be guidance counselor for emotionally disturbed children. As long as I can help kids, I’ll be content. I’d also love to get into coaching,” said Rizzo.

I don't know what's more shocking - the career path she actually chose to persue or the fact that a college softball catcher is, in fact, a lesbian.

She was actually a damn good player. Some highlights from the Record article:

• During her freshman year, she was named to the National Collegiate Athletic Association East Region All-Tournament Team. She had a .348 batting average, with eight home runs, 10 doubles, one triple and 26 RBIs.
• The next year, she had a .367 batting average, with 23 hits, two doubles, three home runs and 14 RBIs. She was named to the NCAA East Region All-Tournament Team and the NJAC 1st Team All-Conference.
• Last season, she had 41 hits on 119 at bats, with a .345 batting average. She had eight doubles and 27 RBIs. Rizzo was also named to the NJAC 2nd Team All-Conference.