I am fine with fantasy experts. It shouldn’t really be a profession because it’s such a crap shoot but if someone is ‘talented’ enough to convince a million dollar company to hire him for his expertise on an activity that takes as much skill, strategy and dumb luck as checkers, well good for that individual.
Nothing is worse than an expert saying one of your guys will have a big day. They are having a good season and then someone notices and its four straight weeks of no catches or 40 yards on 20 carries. It’s like dating the town whore. She nails anyone with a debit card but decides you are the guy she wants to “turn over a new leaf with.” Blue Balls, party of two, your table is now ready. (Case in point, LT is having a fantastic ‘town whore’ season. Ask his first time owners)
That brings us to ole’ margarine mouth himself: Peter King. (How do you like that segway?—smooth). This season SI.com has ‘gently forced’ him to make weekly fantasy picks. He probably said no thinking it would harm his reputation (and he was right) but then when the company that signs your paycheck pushes enough you basically have to submit to their wishes.
That brings us to this week. King decided to highlight Marshawn Lynch and JP Losman as his ‘good picks this week.’ Both of which I am depending on to guide me to a win, keep me alive for the playoffs and salvage an otherwise terrible season.
If he stays true to form, King has just kicked me squarely in the nuts.
Jesus Christ has it come to that? Banking on Losman and the Buffalo Bills? Seriously, Pete, just kick again for good measure. I have a date with the town whore I am not going to need them anyway.
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