Saturday, December 29, 2007

The lesser of two evils

The 'Pursuit of Perfection' comes down to this...Who can sports fan tolerate longer?

The 1972 Dolphins show up on TV and in print every season that a team reaches about 10-0 and the 'can they go undefeated' column gets pulled and updated from every sports writer's Save folder. It's right under the 'Coach ____ has to go' piece and the 'holiday wish list' that compiles all the things the old crotch wants to change about sports.

I've become numb to Dolphins by now. Especially this season. Csonka, Shula, Griese, and ol' Merc are just old men talking about old glory and when the game was great. They are like every other old guy in life, if you ignore them long enough they go away. If that fails, just finish every one of their stories for them and they get the hint.

Shouldn't Merc's head get an * ?

But if the Pats do go undefeated they will replace the Dolphins as the go-to guys for sound clips, quotes and feelings about another team going undefeated. Can we live with that? Do we need to see Tom Brady every season talking about the undefeated season as he ages gracefully and has already moved on to seven other models with names missing vowels and bodies tighter than a nun's va-jay-jay? Could I handle Teddy Bruschi and Mike Vrabel trotted out every pregame show to talk about what it was like in the locker room? Will Belichick even talk to a reporter after he retires? Could I stand Randy Moss in graying cornrows yapping about how great this team was? I have to say yes to all of the above.

It's the lesser of two evils. But at least if I have to watch the 2007 Patriots for the next five decades, I will remember the season. I will remember the team, the games, the way they toyed and teased and then dominated a team. I'll remember the Monday Night game when Baltimore came so close to ending the undefeated run and turning Brian Bilick's ego to a code red threat. But at least I will remember and won't have to rely on shoddy footage, the memory of men who can't tell you what they had for dinner let alone the accounts of a game from 1972, and the ramblings of Mercury Morris rewriting history.

It hurts me to say this, because of the fan base involved, but I am hoping for a Patriots undefeated season. I'd much rather see Kool-Aid Maroney rapping on Sportcenter for the next forty years.

It's going to be fantastic television to have Kool-Aid warning any potential undefeated teams not to call him when dey in his hood, but call him when dey in his crib. WASH YOU ASS!

No comments: