Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Former Packer QBs Lining Up to Compete for Starting Job

When they heard Coach Mike McCarthy was offering retired Packer quarterbacks the chance to compete for the starting gig, several former Green Bay signal callers felt they still had a little gas left in their tanks.

Bart Starr
Age: 74
Pros: More mobile and able to escape pocket than the elderly Favre. Starr has an NFL award named after him. The Bart Starr Award recognizes outstanding character, a lack of which by Packer QBs lately has caused this pre-season mess. He's a Hall of Fame quarterback and when a Hall of Fame quarterback who has been an icon for your team says he can still play, nothing else matters. And he's the only one actually in the Hall of Fame.

Bart Starr Statue
Age: 4
Pros: More mobile and able to escape pocket than the elderly Favre. Never addicted to pain killers. Doesn't cry at press conferences.

Don Majkowski
Age 44
Pros: Has a Majk touch. His injury paved the way to Brett Favre seeing the field and subsequently finding success. That should account for something. You OWE him Green Bay. You owe him.

Doug Pederson
Age: 40
Pros: A long-time Favre backup, he knows the system, without having to take a beating by actually having to play. He can hold the spot down for Rodgers and teach young Aaron a thing a two, much like he did for McNabb in Philadelphia.

Ty Detmer
Age 41
Pros: 2 for 1 deal, apprenticed under brother Koy in the craft of holding. He's a Heisman winner with a bloodline. Cares more about football than he does hunting and fishing in Mississippi. Can spell "Mississippi."

6 comments:

DMtShooter said...

Dammit, you forgot Arnie Herber. Don Hutson would have been nothing without him, and just because he's been dead for nearly 40 years doesn't mean that John Madden wouldn't fellate him.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arnie_Herber

Joe said...

No Lynn Dickey?!?
Damn, that's cold.

Andrew said...

John Hadl and Blair Kiel are upset by this turn of events...

Chip Ramsey said...

Scott Hunter, Lynn Dickey and Jerry Tagge have also expressed interest

Bob Mantz said...

Great write up HHR!

MMayes said...

Carlos Brown ("Bubba" from the TV show "Heat of the Night") QB'd the team for a few games in the mid-70's sends his regrets. He will be available for the playoffs, however, because his term as mayor of Fresno expires in January 2009. Perhaps David Whitehurst could hold down the fort until then.