Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Obama To Find Replacement For Tom Izzo

It appears President Barack Obama is not done yet in the state of Michigan. On the heels of Michigan State's lackluster performance in last night's NCAA Men's National Championship Game against the University of North Carolina, the President has announced plans to find a replacement for longtime head coach Tom Izzo.

The Spartans, coached by Izzo, fell to North Carolina by a lopsided score of 89-72 in what had been billed as a boost for the spirit of the state of Michigan, still reeling over the struggles of the auto industry. Apparently the loss was too much for Obama- who recently replaced General Motors Head Rick Wagoner- to handle. In a White House speech, Obama said that college basketball teams and Michigan State in particular, must stand on their own, not as "wards of the state" supported by tax dollars.

Michigan State University Board of Trustees had assembled various plans to get the school back on proper footing including but not limited to: increased recruiting, unveiling yet another alternate uniform, and using Magic Johnson by any means necessary. These plans were all summarily rejected by the White House leaving Obama to again step in and find a replacement.

With this announcement the coaching carousel continues to turn that has recently seen John Calipari take over at Kentucky and Sean Miller at Arizona. No replacement for Izzo has yet to be named, but according to a source within the White House, the following pool of candidates are being considered: Bobby Knight, Rick Pitino, Isiah Thomas, and 98 year old John Wooden.

When questioned at his White House speech exactly what he is doing interfering with college basketball, Obama shot back, "Have you seen my bracket? I had UNC winning this whole thing, don't you watch ESPN?

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