The Cynic's Guide to College Football: Round One

From a cynic’s perspective, last night’s Round One of the NFL draft was very disappointing. After all, my job is to write about the bad and stupid things that football teams do. And yesterday was remarkably devoid of that. Sure, there were some surprises (Clausen falling out of the first round). And some teams reached for players they probably could have gotten later (Tebow, Alualu). And invariably some of these players will be busts. But all in all, I think most teams did what they needed to do. So with that, I’ll do my best to comment on a few things about draft night.

What fun is the draft when I can’t even point and laugh at the Raiders?

Bring Back Saturday!

First off, I hate the new three-day format. While I understand their efforts to get more viewers during prime-time, I really didn’t like the draft competing with the NBA playoffs. Plus, when the early rounds were on Saturday, that was my one day in about six months in which I could use football as an excuse to put off chores and sit in front of the TV all day. The draft—at least the first couple of rounds—was my get-out-of-jail free card for one day off from spring cleaning and housework. Now, it’s going to be hard to justify to my wife (and myself) why I should spend my Saturday waiting for someone to take a punter in the sixth round instead of fixing the fence in the back yard.

This looks like a job for Mr. Irrelevant!

Nice Guys Finish First

Last night was a big night for “high character” guys. Sam Bradford, Ndamukong Suh and Gerald McCoy are three of the nicest, humblest, most down-to-earth guys you will ever meet. Meanwhile, Dez Bryant, once projected as a top-ten pick, slid all the way to Dallas at #24 based on his off-field issues. With so much focus the last two week on Ben Roethlisberger’s issues, it was nice to see these kind of guys get rewarded. It’ll be interesting to see as the draft progresses if NFL GMs shy away from talented but troubled players in favor of Boy Scouts.

Bradford can smile all the way to the bank.

Injuries are Overrated

On another front, it was good to see two great players who came back for their senior years not have their draft stock hampered by injuries. Sam Bradford, projected as a top pick last year, went #1 overall despite playing in only three games this year due to shoulder injuries. Oklahoma tight end Jermaine Gresham, projected as a mid- to late-first round last year, missed his entire senior season with a knee injury. But he still went #21 to the Bengals, the first tight end taken. (For comparison, last year’s top tight end, Brandon Pettigrew, went to the Lions at #20).

Carson Palmer is the happiest man in Cincinnati today.

And on the Third First Day, Tebow Shall Be Drafted

There was great wailing and gnashing of teeth coming from the Rocky Mountains last night when the Broncos traded up to draft Tim Tebow in the first round. I’m certainly not a Tebow hater, but you have to question the thought process here. It’s obvious the Broncos loved Tebow. Fine. But the Broncos had the 11th pick in the second round. With most teams having Clausen and McCoy higher on their boards, even if some teams in need of a QB got into the game, odds are that Tebow still would have been there. So in essence, the Broncos traded 2nd, 3rd and 4th round picks to move up 18 slots . To their credit, the Broncos have made several trades and still have a stockpile of draft picks, so they have potential for a very solid draft class. But I just think they ended up buying something they could have had anyway.

Just because.

“Who the Hell is Mel Kiper?”

Speaking of Tebow, am I the only one who found Mel Kiper’s reaction when Tebow was drafted hilarious? Kiper acted like someone had just personally insulted his entire family tree when someone dared to take Tebow ahead of his golden child, Jimmy Clausen. I kept waiting for him to pull out dueling pistols and “demand satisfaction.” The only person more worried right now than Jimmy Clausen? U. of Washington QB Jake Locker, who Kiper has already anointed as next year’s #1 pick.

Am I the only one who thinks Kiper is better suited for a Twilight movie than an NFL draft room?

On the plus side, with plenty of talent still left on the board, there's still plenty of time for your favorite team to completely screw the pooch. So stay tuned.

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Government at Work: Self-Esteem for Women and Sam Bradford

As the country loses 500 million jobs a month, Nancy Pelosi finds time to address the difficult problems that face the nation. Today, the U.S. House is set to vote on these important issues of State and put Representatives on record:

H.Res. 114 - Supports the goals and ideals of "National Girls and Women in Sports Day”

The resolution lists a number of critical findings for the future of the nation including:

• Despite great advancement, high school girls still receive 1,300,000 fewer participation opportunities than do boys, and the money spent on girls' sports is still far less than that spent on boys' sports;
• High school girls who play sports are more likely to get better grades in school and are more likely to graduate than girls who do not play sports;
• Girls and women who play sports have a more positive body image, higher levels of confidence and self-esteem, and experience higher states of psychological well-being than girls and women who do not play sports;
• The celebration of `National Girls and Women in Sports Day' would increase awareness of the importance sports play in the lives of girls and women in the United States

H.Res. 60 - Recognizing and commending University of Oklahoma quarterback Sam Bradford

• Sam Bradford's mother and father have instilled in him an unparalleled work ethic, outstanding leadership qualities, and a desire to excel;
• Sam Bradford is an active citizen of the Cherokee Nation of Oklahoma;
• Sam Bradford is a dedicated student at the University of Oklahoma, majoring in Finance and maintaining a 3.95 grade point average;
• On October 18, 2008, Sam Bradford passed for 468 yards against the University of Kansas, setting a University of Oklahoma record for most passing yards in a single game;
• In 2008 Sam Bradford guided Oklahoma to a 12-1 record and played an essential role in Oklahoma's victory over the University of Missouri in the 2008 Big 12 Championship game on December 6, 2008; and,
• In December 13, 2008, Sam Bradford became the 5th Oklahoma football player to win the Heisman Trophy, college football's most coveted and prestigious award.

Think how good Jordan would have been if he could have paralleled Bradford’s work ethic.

Thank you Nancy for getting these important national goals accomplished.

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