I must start off with some sad news. As you may have noticed, there was no Week One wrapup posted last week. This is because I was hiding out and waiting for the investigation to blow over while I planned how to spend all the blogger money that nice guy from Nigeria tells me should be here any day now. But unfortunately, it looks like that’s not how it’s going to go down. So, it is with deep regret, I am announcing that I will be returning the “Participant” ribbon I earned during my third grade field day. I apologize for any embarrassment I may have caused to my fellow classmates and the fine instructors at Benjamin Franklin Elementary.
Wow, feels good to get that off my chest. Now, moving on to our cynical view of the first two weeks of college football . . .
You Be the Judge Take a guess: 70’s porn star or 2010 college football player? (answer below)
Call It Like It Is I know we all get sick of the coaches’ pregame press conferences before the national contender vs. weak sisters of the poor games, where they talk about how much respect they have for their opponent, how the other team has a lot of great athletes, blah blah blah. Well, kudos to Oklahoma’s Bob Stoops for finally telling like it is. Several OU fan friends of mine reported that, late in a struggling 31-24 win over Utah State, Bob Stoops could be heard yelling at his struggling secondary, “This is UTAH STATE we’re playing!” Yes, it was an unscripted moment, but kudos to Stoops for at least appealing to his players’ pride and pointing out that the game shouldn’t have been within 5 touchdowns by that point. (I’ve since heard the audio for myself, but have yet to find a link online. If anyone knows somewhere I can get it, please send it my way.)
C'mon, Bob. Tell us how you really feel.
The Biggest Loser We’re only two weeks into the season, and we can already nominate the biggest loser of the season. And it’s a team that might not actually lose a game. A week ago, the talk was how Boise State, fresh off their win over Virginia Tech, could become the first non-BCS AQ school to play in the championship game. Then it happened. And by it, I mean Viriginia Tech pissing down their leg in a loss to in-state rival James Madison. And when I say rival, I mean they reside in the same state, but the similarity and competition pretty much ends there. Now, instead of Boise supporters pointing to that big signature regular season win they’d been lacking on their resume, the detractors now have ample evidence that Boise isn’t that good. You’re known by the company you keep. And if Boise’s best win is a last-minute victory over a team that loses at home to James Madison, fair or not, that doesn’t really speak well for Boise’s body of work.
I hear Tempe’s nice that time of year. But then you already knew that, didn’t you?
I Don’t Want to See A Replay of This Last week, new Tennessee coach Derek Dooley had to give his players lessons in showering and proper hygiene after a handful of Vols players came down with staph infections. This is how low UT sunk under Lane Kiffin—the players had lost the ability to bathe themselves.
Maybe they hired the wrong guy.
Keeping Chiropractors in Business Since . . . Last Week Don’t be surprised if a lot of folks in the stands at Kansas’ next home game are wearing neck braces. It’s hard to imagine a bigger case of whiplash than the one Jayhawks fans just experienced. KU started off the season with a debacle, losing 6-3 to I-AA (I still can’t get used to calling it FCS) North Dakota State. And one game in to his career, the seat was already getting pretty warm under new coach Turner Gill. But, one week later, the Jayhawks did a complete turnaround, upsetting #15 Georgia Tech. It’s hard to imagine a bigger one-week turnaround taking place. And with a very winnable schedule (only one ranked team--#8 Nebraska—left this year and no Texas or Oklahoma), all the hope that seemed to be lost after week one may slowly be returning to Lawrence.
“Excuse me, but does this come in blue?”
War Damn (Bye) Eagle I don’t know who does the SEC scheduling, but I’m pretty sure he’s an Auburn alum. In looking at Alabama’s schedule, I noticed something—each of Bama’s last seven opponents have a bye the week before they have to face the Tide.
Be Careful What You Wish For Speaking of scheduling, Nebraska may be second-guessing it’s decision to join the Big 10 next year. With the new divisions and schedules being announced recently, Nebraska’s conference schedule next season includes home games with Ohio State and Iowa, along with road tilts against Wisconsin, Penn State and Michigan. Throw in nonconference games against Fresno State and Washington and, as one Lincoln writer put it, “The only thing missing from Nebraska's 2011, 2012 schedule is a cigarette and a blindfold.”
The Big 10’s version of rookie hazing.
Oh, and the answer to the photo question above: That’s Nebraska sophomore DE Cameron Meredith rocking the sweet ‘stache.
Well, after much wailing and gnashing of teeth about the impending Armageddon of conference realignment, the bomb has finally dropped and we’re left with, well, pretty much what we already had. Nebraska moved to the Big 10. Colorado and (reportedly) Utah will be heading to the Pac-10. And Mountain West teams will soon be heading to the Smurf Turf of Boise State. But other than that, it all turned out to be much ado about nothing. But that doesn’t mean we can’t engage still in a little snap judgment. With that, here are (in no particular order) the Big 12(10) Winners and Losers in the expansion fiasco.
WINNERS
1. Texas. The big winners in all of this. Love ‘em or hate ‘em, it’s hard not to respect the piece of Machiavelliangenius that Texas just pulled off. The Longhorns successfully managed to dupe the Pac-10, (most of) the rest of the Big 12 and the national sports media. And what did they get?
A potential new TV deal that will pay them even more.
Nine other schools now completely at the Longhorns’ mercy.
Making the five schools that didn't have a BCS conference invite sign over their share of the Nebraska and Colorado buyout money.
An even greater revenue disparity to their benefit.
Their own TV network.
A conference schedule that will, in all likelihood, put them just one game away from a shot at the national title every year.
In other words, everything they wanted from the beginning and then some. Rob Oller of the Columbus Dispatch put it best: “No one can say Horns never play anyone. They just played everyone.”
Forget the World Series of Poker. DeLoss Dodds is the real Texas Hold ‘Em Champion.
2. The Big 12 Teams Not Named Texas (Short-Term). If Dan Beebe can pull off his miracle TV deal he claims he can get, the TV package for all the schools will grow significantly. More importantly, the remaining Big 12 schools that didn’t have BCS conference invites are spared the indignity of having to beg the Mountain West or the MAC for membership.
3. The Big 10. They add one of the most successful programs in NCAA history that brings in big TV numbers. They finally get a conference championship game for a big money payday. And, by not jumping the gun to super-conference status right now, they leave themselves some wiggle room for Notre Dame future expansion.
4. Nebraska. Tom Osborne proved to be prophetic. Whether you agree with his opinion of them or not, it’s true that everything he lamented in the conference—the shifting of power to Texas, the unequal revenue distribution, the lack of a Big 12 network, etc.—not only will continue under the new Big 12, but appear to be getting even worse. For good or bad, the culture of the conference simply isn’t what it once was. Nebraska had become an outsider in its own conference and the move to the Big Ten was a natural one. Yes, the extra money ($22-$25 million instead of the $10 million they made in the Big 12) and the chance to leave Texas behind are nice, but perhaps even more important the move gives the Cornhuskers the stability and egalitarian culture lacking in the Big 12.
“What can I say, I TRIED to warn them.”
5. Chip Brown, Orangebloods.com. Yes, it seems a little slimy when a site trolling for subscribers and serving as a mouthpiece for the biggest player in all this is the one breaking the stories. And, sure, those stories weren’t always accurate (he broke both the report that Texas was joining the Pac-10 and that Texas was staying with the Big 12). But over the last week, he’s had ESPN eating out of his hand and become a household name with football geeks waiting on pins and needles for his next Tweet.
What do Chip’s sources say today?
6. Pot dealers. When Colorado and California get together for their first Pac-10 meeting, there may not be enough dope, tie dye or Phish cover bands to go around.
Tailgating in Boulder
7. Stewart Mandel, Sports Illustrated. The man predicted Nebraska’s move—three years ago.
8. The Red River Rivalry. With Nebraska out of the picture and no conference championship game, the annual Oklahoma/Texas shootout becomes a de facto conference title game and very likely a play-in game for a BCS title shot.
One of the biggest games in college football gets even bigger. Plus it has corn dogs.
9. T. Boone Pickens. Without having to compete with Phil Knight, Pickens can maintain his status as the biggest spender in the conference.
Lord Boone mingling with the commoners.
10. Arizona and Arizona State. Under the proposed Pac-10 expansion discussions, the Wildcats and Sun Devils would have been put in a western division with the six new schools from the Big 12. In other words, they would have to play Texas and Oklahoma every year. Now they can breathe a sigh of relief and still hold on to that pipe dream of making it back to the Rose Bowl someday. Plus, Bob and Mike Stoops don't have to worry about those awkward family reunions.
LOSERS
1. The Big 12 Teams Not Named Texas (Long-Term). This whole process showed one thing. Texas is the king, and everybody else in the conference exists for the sole purpose of doing the Longhorns bidding. If there was any doubt about who the top program in college athletics is, it’s over now. While the smaller schools in the conference are breathing a sigh of relief right now, I wouldn’t get too comfortable. The only reason the Big 12 exists today is because, right now, it is in Texas’ best interest. But the Longhorns won’t commit to anything long term (another reason Nebraska wanted out—UT refused to commit to anything past 2016), so the conference may be right back in this same position a few years from now when the new TV deal runs out. Texas is looking out for Texas. Period. And if the revenue doesn’t come in like projected or they think they can cut a better deal somewhere else, the rest of the Big 12 will all be scrambling for new homes.
Help, help, I’m being repressed!
2. Missouri. The Tigers have had their bags packed for months, not even trying to conceal their love affair with the Big 10. So to get stranded at the altar in favor of Nebraska had to sting quite a bit. Plus, they’re now stuck with a new TV deal where the revenue disparity will be even bigger than before and they have to play both Texas and Oklahoma every year. While they have to hold out hope that the Big 10 may expand somewhere down the line, the uncertainty of their immediate future has to have Mizzou hating life.
“I want to go to the Big Ten THIS much.”
3. Colorado’s Short-Term Future. Colorado tried to get ahead of the curve by jumping to the Pac-10, expecting the Big 12 to dissolve behind them. Because it didn’t, the Buffs are now on the hook for approximately $9 million over the next two years in lost revenue they owe back to the Big 12 as punishment for leaving.
And you thought CU fans were upset when they couldn’t come up with the money to buy out Dan Hawkins.
4. Oklahoma’s Self-Respect. The Sooners’ marching band is called the Pride of Oklahoma. After this week’s developments, they may have to rethink that. For some inexplicable reason, OU Athletic Director Joe Castiglione kept finding ways to reiterate the fact that the Sooners would go wherever Texas went. While that move might (and I emphasize might) have been in OU’s best interest (at least in the short term), did it really help to paint the Sooners into a corner like that, take all other options off the table and basically admit that OU has become the Longhorns’ little sister?
C’mon, Joe. You guys are better than that.
5. Journalism. I, for one, will never trust any future article with the line “Sources close to the program say . . .” again. There was so much misinformation and outright deception going on that journalistic integrity was the first casualty in the Great Expansion Wars of 2010. And if someone wasn’t breaking incorrect stories, then someone else was running with that information and claiming it as their own.
I’m looking at you, Joe Schad.
6. Brett Favre. For the first time in years, the annual summer “will he or won’t he” retirement talk hasn’t been the biggest offseason story in football.
"Hello? Will somebody pay attention to me now?"
7. Big 12 Relevance. For some time, the Big 12 North division has largely been an afterthought. The winner of the Oklahoma/Texas game would go on, win the conference championship and then go on to the BCS. But there was always at least a little bit of intrigue, given the history of title game upsets (Texas in ’96, A&M in 98, Kansas State in ’03, etc.) and Nebraska’s recent resurgence. All that, however, goes out the window with the loss of the conference title game and no real competition for the Longhorns and Sooners. Barring some huge upsets, 9 of the league’s 10 teams will effectively be irrelevant on the college football scene by mid-October.
8. Dan Beebe’s Math. I took calculus in high school, and then clepped out my college math requirements. So I haven’t studied math in . . . let’s see, minus 18, times the circumference, carry the one . . . a lot of years. But I still can’t figure out how Big 12 Commissioner Dan Beebe figures that subtracting one of your better TV draws (Nebraska), scrapping a conference championship game and losing the Denver media market somehow adds up to almost doubling the conference’s TV contract.
9. The Pac-10. Here they thought they had Texas, the biggest fish in the college football sea, coming aboard. All they had to do was take their in-state rivals, Texas A&M and Texas Tech, with them. But then word got out that Baylor had friends in high places and that some Texas legislators were threatening to submarine the deal if Baylor wasn’t included in the package. So the Pac-10 tried to call their bluff, issuing a pre-emptive invitation to Colorado. However, the plan backfired and, instead of getting Texas as the jewel in their conference crown, they’re stuck with an underachieving Colorado program that just got hit with NCAA scholarship reductions.
10. Jerry Jones. Jerry had just secured the Big 12 Championship game for his new Taj Mahal in Dallas through 2013. Now it appears that there won’t be a title game past 2010.
Available for parties, weddings, rehearsals, bar mitzvahs...
In recent weeks, there has been a lot of discussion about conference expansion and realignment. At the top of that list is the Big 10’s expressed desire to expand to 14 or 16 teams. While much has been discussed (Notre Dame pipe dream, anyone?), the three most common—and logical—potentials to join the Big 10 are Missouri, Nebraska and Rutgers.
After a great deal of thorough analysis over some frosty beverages, I’ve come to one carefully-reasoned conclusion—this is a marriage made in football heaven and everybody involved would have to be a complete freakin’ idiot to not pull the trigger on this deal.
Although somehow “Big 14” doesn’t have the same ring to it.
First, let’s look at what those three schools would gain from joining the Big 10.
Academics—Some colleges still have this crazy notion that universities exist for purposes other than supporting football teams (strange, I know). Missouri, Nebraska and Rutgers—along with all 11 members of the current Big 10—are members of the American Association of Universities. If you’re known by the company you keep, AAU represents the cool kids in academic circles. Only 63 colleges and universities are members, but they receive 57% of all federal research dollars (more than $17 billion). 70% of U.S. Nobel Prize winners have been affiliated with one of these schools. In other words, the Big 10, especially with the addition of these three schools, would have a whole lot more in the way of academic funding and prestige than the Big 12 or Big East can offer.
It’s no Heisman, but it’ll do.
Equality—Over the course of the Big 12’s history, Nebraska has been on the losing end of more than one 11-1 votes. And others in the Big 12 North have quietly grumbled about the power in the conference moving south. The current state of the Big 12 is very simple—whatever Texas wants, Texas gets. A TV contract that heavily benefits the big name schools? You got it. Moving the Big 12 title game to Texas permanently? No problem. The list goes on. In the Big 12, the rich (Texas and Oklahoma) keep getting richer. The Big 10 is much more egalitarian in its structure, with all members treated more or less equally. (For example, they are the only conference in which all teams share BCS money evenly).
Clap if you’re a fan of the Big 12
Money—The Big One. Let’s be honest, none of this talk would even be on the table if there wasn’t money—and a lot of it—at stake. Under their current football TV contracts, Nebraska and Missouri each pull in approximately $10 million annually, while Rutgers gets about $4 million. If the Big 10 expands, each school would get in the neighborhood of $22 to $25 million. I’m not great at math, but even I can crunch those numbers.
Warren Buffett is a Nebraska fan. And he knows a good deal when he sees one.
So what does the Big 10 gain from these three extra schools?
Money—Yes, it all comes back to money again. Don’t act surprised. With these three schools in the mix, you pull in the New York/New Jersey, Saint Louis and Kansas City media markets. And while Nebraska may be small in terms of population, it is a traditional power that routinely brings in the big TV viewership numbers appealing to advertisers. In other words, you’re going to have a whole lot of eyes watching these games. They way I understand the Big Ten TV contract, they get 10 cents per cable subscriber in non-Big 10 areas, but approximately 70 cents per subscriber in Big 10 markets. Take that net 60 cents per subscriber difference times the number of cable subscribers in New York City, New Jersey, Missouri and Nebraska and you’re talking about a pretty good chunk of change. And that doesn’t even include the revenue from a potential conference title game, additional bowl bids, etc.
The Big 10 Network gets a whole lot Bigger. And Tennier.
History—To be sure, the Big 10 is not lacking for history or storied programs. But the addition of Rutgers (played in the very first college football game in 1869) and Nebraska (5 national titles and a laundry list of national award winners) certainly wouldn’t hurt the conference’s record books.
Rutgers 6, Princeton 4. You can’t get more old school than that.
Other Sports—While the focus of most of the expansion talk has understandably been on football, Missouri, Nebraska and Rutgers bring a lot to the table in other sports. For example, Missouri would be an immediate favorite for the baseball title. Nebraska volleyball would have a natural rival in Penn State as Final Four fixtures. And Rutgers women’s basketball has become a perennial contender.
Nebraska and Penn State have won 6 of the last 11 national championships in women’s volleyball, including the last three straight by PSU.
Are their downsides? Sure. Higher travel costs. The (potential) end of some traditional rivalries. Possibly fewer recruiting inroads in Texas for MU and NU. Some restructuring and rescheduling of the current Big 10. But are any of those reasons enough to say no to this deal? Absolutely not. At the end of the day, there’s really no good reason for this deal NOT to happen.
Too bad Texas Tech and Oklahoma aren't playing this weekend, because there is NOTHING of consequence being contested this weekend. Sure, we could all keep an eye out for the huge upset: Alabama plays Mississippi State on Saturday, and the Bulldogs have beaten the Tide two straight; also South Carolina plays at Florida, and you know coach Spurrier will pull out all the stops to try and beat the Gators. Otherwise, I'm going to be left doing my best to put a good face on what looks to be a very ugly slate of games.
Looking first at the Big Ten: Since Penn State lost last week, count me among those who are thrilled to (finally) write the conference off this year. Let's all send Iowa a big "thank you" for exposing Penn State before an SEC or Big XII team could do so in the national championship game.
That said, the Big Ten intramural season continues on this weekend, so I'll throw out a couple lines just in case you're craving a taste.
NORTHWESTERN (+3 1/2) vs Michigan MINNESOTA (+ 13 1/2) vs Wisconsin #10 Ohio State vs. ILLINOIS (+9 1/2)
In case you’re looking for winless teams playing at home this weekend, you’re in luck because we’ve got two on the slate this week. It’s doesn’t say much that both Washington and Syracuse are getting bunches of points at home and I couldn’t come close to considering them.
UCLA (-7) at Washington UCONN (-10) vs. Syracuse
Now on to some not so terrible games (but I still can’t convince you that I’ll be watching this weekend):
NOTRE DAME (-4) vs. Navy: After last year’s upset of Notre Dame in South Bend, the Midshipmen are looking to make it two straight against the Irish. Charlie Weis will be back on the headset calling plays for the Irish this weekend, and I don’t understand why he ever stopped in the first place – he’s a better coordinator than he is a head coach to begin with. This game is on the road and the Irish are terrible away from South Bend, so the Middies definitely have a chance. I don’t see the Irish completely folding up, but I guess anything’s possible.
California vs. # 23 OREGON STATE: After Oregon State shocked USC early this season, the Trojans got slammed for losing to a supposedly god-awful team and were punished by dropping 9,000,000 spots in the polls. That loss doesn’t look so bad now, with OSU sitting at 6-3 and ranked in the top 25. Let’s remember that when USC gets snubbed out of the national championship game.
#17 NORTH CAROLINA (-3) vs. Maryland: Forget about going to Tennessee – UNC coach Butch Davis has got a very good thing going in just year two of his coaching tenure at North Carolina. UNC needs a win to keep pace with Miami atop the ACC Coastal division, and I think they get the win on the road against the Terps this weekend.
BOSTON COLLEGE (+6 1/2) vs. Florida State: Can you call a team “plucky” and not make it sound like an insult? I like BC, even if they are down a bit vs. the standard they set last year. Outside of a bad loss at North Carolina, BC has been close in the other two games they lost – 19-16 to Georgia Tech, and 27-21 to Clemson. I don’t think they’ll beat the ‘Noles in Tallahassee, but the 6 ½ points they’re getting on the road is enticing enough for me to pick them this week.
Vanderbilt vs. KENTUCKY (-3 1/2): Both Vandy and UK got off to fast starts this season, but predictably both stumbled a bit once SEC conference play began. Kentucky is bowl eligible for the third year in a row at 6-4, and a win here would go a long way to preventing a return trip to the Music City Bowl in Nashville. Vandy is close behind at 5-4 and looking for that elusive sixth win – since 1984, however, a five-win Vandy team has played the Cats four times and come up empty each time out. UK looked impressive in last week’s last second 42-38 loss to Georgia, and I’m looking for some of that same offensive success to carry over here.
C'mon, Bob. Tell us how you really feel.
I hear Tempe’s nice that time of year. But then you already knew that, didn’t you? 
Maybe they hired the wrong guy.
“Excuse me, but does this come in blue?”
The Big 10’s version of rookie hazing. 
