That Voodoo That You Do So Well

If the Rays showed us anything last night, it was that reliever JP Howell has mastered the art of Josh Beckett voodoo douchebaggery.

Observations From This Weekend's LCS Games

What's harder to swallow? The Bud Light push to make baseball fans believe the beer is drinkable?

Or the fact that the MLB Playoff house band features a guy popped for drinking and driving with his 10-year old kid in the car?

That's why IIIII. Looooove. This Toooown.

Say hey. Say HEY!


Josh Beckett goes to great lengths to insist that he's healthy. Stops short of citing his voodoo charms as justification. Does not deny being a douchebag.

Phillies fans started a "Beat LA" chant in Philly on Friday to which Phil's radio announcer Larry Anderson commented, "I resent that."

Things a little tiring in LA:

• Manny's (who is looking more and more like the wacky alien in the Ethan Hawke/River Phoenix 1985 classic "Explorers") pockmarks & mouthpiece.

Athletes can achieve their optimal performance by submitting to a dental procedure that combines electronic stimulation, measurement and analysis to create a custom "pure power mouthpiece" (PPM), according to its orthdondist inventor and others certified to perform the technique. As unlikely as it sounds, major league athletes such as the Boston Red Sox's Manny Ramirez are wearing the PPM to improve performance, sans drugs.

Hmmm. Does it also cause you to be batshit crazy and have your face break out in pockmarks? And I bet Boston fans love Manny going nuts over Billingsley not showing a "team-like" attitude in failing to retaliate when he gets hit by pitches. Beckett should have plunked him for tanking in Beantown.

• "I love LA"
• Tim McCarver
• LA celebrity shots
  
• Nomar's ADD
• Russell Martin crying

• Growing a beard does not make you Red Sox-esq.
  

What Exactly Am I Missing Here?

HHR presents...Real F'n Toolboxes. Today we salute you Mr. Boston Red Sox pitcher stuck in 1995.

"Yeah hi. Josh? Dave Navarro here. I want my look back."
(Photo: sittingstill.net)

All day we've seen nothing but praise for how bad-ass Josh Beckett allegedly is. Why? Because he blamed a guy for dropping his bat on what he thought was ball four? Because he dropped an f-bomb at a post-game press conference regarding his old trim singing the National Anthem?

Remember when Ryan Howard hit a bomb in spring training that fell a bit short and Beckett thought he looked at it a bit too long and took offense?

Hey. Jack off. Get over yourself.

You play a game for a living half a year and once every 5 days.

Take your frat boy flavor-saver and hemp and seashell necklaces and act like a professional. Grow up.

Yeah. Great. You throw a little white ball fast. My God that's wonderful. Go yell and scream and piss and moan and stomp because you have no control over your emotions because someone "stepped to you. "

It's funny because usually we only lose our emotions when we DO care about things and they DO really bother us. And sometimes we even make snappy 8th grade comebacks like "yeah thanks for flying my friend out for free." But you are the exception to that rule. You only get emotional and/or dismissive when things DONT bother you. You're too cool for school, my man. Gotta get me a necklace. And a soul patch.

But yeah. We get it. You're emotional. But guess what? So was this guy. Doesn't make you tough.

Cleveland Schemers

Deadspin: Here's your ex

So.... did they really think this little trick was going to work? Shame on you, Cleveland. Shame on you.

Rather than rely on home-field advantage, momentum, etc, they have decided to parade Sox ace and tonight's starting pitcher Josh Beckett's ex-girlfriend out on the field, just prior to the opening pitch to sing the national anthem.

Now, they claim that they didn't know. Whatever. If they did know, and they thought it would play a head game with Beckett, then I think that was a weak, feeble, and sad attempt at some sort of advantage. Both parties involved are professionals, and this sort of fateful meeting shouldn't matter to either of them. If they each do their job to the best of their ability, then well, it'll all be forgotten about quicker than you can say "Chief Wawhoo."

Both Beckett and his ex are famous, though I have honestly never heard of the girl. They probably switch relationships as often as Clevelanders switch underpants (though, that might not be saying much..... Bazzziiinngggg!) and could give a crap about seeing one other.

Seriously though, this was news today?

-posted by Ariel