2009's Most Forgettable Sports Moments

While many choose to look back at 2009 by highlighting championship performances, scandalous transgressions and overall warm, fuzzy nostalgia, when the history books are written, there will be several happenings this past year that will be forgotten - be it by accident or by selective memory. For perseverance's sake, here's a look at some of the HHR crew's least memorable moments, stories and figures of 2009.

Dale Jr.'s "Breakout" Season

Dale Jr.'s second year at Hendrick Motorsports was supposed to be his breakout year. In 2008, he made the Chase, and this past year he was supposed to contend. Instead, Junior found himself with his worst season in NASCAR, and had to watch from the sidelines as his Hendrick teammates finished 1, 2, 3 in the points standings. A mid-year crew chief change couldn't even ease June Bug's woes.

ACC Football

This year was supposed to be the year for several teams in the ACC. NC State had the ACC's most prolific passer returning, Wake Forest was led by senior signal caller Riley Skinner, VT was Virginia Tech, and Bowden was promising great things as he fought for his job down in Tallahassee. Instead, the ACC struggled all year, losing early games to the likes of William & Mary and never coming close to being in the talk for a National Title contender. Now, the traditionalists' cries for the heads of the guys behind the expansion are growing ever more louder. It was supposed to elevate football in the nation's preeminent basketball conference, right?

Fat College Football Coaches

Apparently, this wasn't the year to be big and on the sidelines with a headset in college. The portly Mark Mangino and the rotund Charlie Weiss both found themselves without a job at the end of the season. While Mangino's dismissal had more to do with his treatment of players than his team's record, Weiss just couldn't eat enough donuts to help the Irish win enough games to keep his job. Surely, Ralph Friedgen's off season diet kept him on the sidelines in College Park, because Maryland's 2-10 record certainly didn't help.

Urban Meyer Resigning at Florida

Quite simply: Proof that the "do-over" rule is alive and well in college athletics.

WNBA's Shock Relocates to Tulsa

You know your league is in trouble when a team wins three championships in the decade and then decides a move from a major sports metro to Tulsa, OK is an upgrade.

Allen Iverson, Memphis Grizzly

"God chose Memphis as the place that I will continue my career. I feel that they are committed to developing a winner." Two months God must've told the Answer to get the hell out of Dodge. Sometimes even God makes mistakes. Either that or he has a helluva sense of humor.

Terrell Owens, Buffalo Bill

While making an initial splash upon signing, TO has since taken backseat to the prospect of the Bills moonlighting in Canada. When all is said and done, it says something when a guy will forever be remembered more for doing sit-ups in his driveway than actually playing for the Buffalo Bills.

The Billy Gillispie Era at UK

Add a new coach (John Calipari), the best player in America (John Wall) and a shiny undefeated record, and it’s hard to believe that the Cats were bounced by Notre Dame in the NIT last year.

The New York Metropolitans

While the team opened a brand new stadium, the cross-city Yankees win the Series over the defending champion/division rival Phillies and fans protest the franchise by forfeiting astronomically-priced season ticket plans, the team looks to rebound in 2010 by signing the likes of Alex Cora, Kelvim Escobar, Henry Blanco, R.A. Dickey and Chris Coste. To add insult to fans' injury, Coste punctuates his signing by reminding NY faithful, "I will always be a Phillie."

Shawne Merriman Performs Lights Out Dance on Tila Tequila

In an incident that was as ridiculous as the bi-sexual reality star's "career," Tila claims "Shawne grabbed her, shook her like a rag doll, threw her down and choked her during an argument last September. Tila says the San Diego Chargers linebacker had a bad temper combined with a drug problem, and that he humiliated her because of her bi-sexuality." Yet, authorities and the public somewhat seem to buy the Charger's claim of acting in the name of being a responsible party host. Charlie Sheen: take note.

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Laimbeer Talks Pistons, Irish, Shock and NCAA Tourney with HHR

With the NCAA Tournament fast approaching former Detroit Piston and current Detroit Shock Head Coach Bill Laimbeer is helping promote the Big Dance along with Coke Zero and their "Taste the Madness" promotion.

Bill spent a few minutes with HHR's Cadillac Mescallade to talk hoops from his days at Notre Dame to the Bad Boys back in Detroit.

Cadillac Mescallade: So first can you tell us a little bit about what's going on with Coke Zero and the "Taste the Madness" website?

Bill Laimbeer: Coke Zero is a large sponsor of the NCAA tournament, and I am helping them make an awareness of a program going on where fans are shooting video of their favorite team, or an individual who is a wild and crazy fan for their own team, and they can upload all those videos at www.tastethemadness.com.

They are gonna pick some winners and they are gonna show them during the final game on CBS-TV. It’s a nice 15 minutes of fame so to speak. And also for the winner, Papa Johns is gonna be throwing a big pizza party for them. Some interesting videos are already up there.

CM: The Big East tourney is underway and you're a Notre Dame guy. What do you make of the Irish this season? It's been a bit of a down year for a very talented team.

BL: It has. You could argue they underachieved, or that the expectations were too high. They will have to do very well in the tournament. If they get to the semi-finals of the [Big East] tournament, they'll be looked at. If they get to the finals [of the Big East Tournament], it will be a good chance to get in [to the NCAA Tournament]. I feel bad for them, they play in the Big East and it’s the toughest conference there is.

CM: What are some of the memories you have from your days playing for Notre Dame?

BL: Well, we were the only team to get to the Final Four for Notre Dame. Just great teammates, and in my junior year 9 players on my team that made the NBA...which you don’t see too often anymore. Also, at that time there was no cable television. NBC had exclusive television rights for one game a week and Notre Dame happened to be on 2 out of 4 weeks, so we got lots of exposure. Also, just the college atmosphere. It went by so fast. I won at every level, and that is the one thing missing, a college title. It just went by so fast, I wish I could do it over again.

CM: Who do you like in this year's tournament?

BL: I'm gonna take the same position as last year: the power teams and power conferences are battle tested teams. The best teams have gone through the ringer every night and have played a tourney game every evening. I think that is going to help them all. I think UNC, UCONN and Pitt as a number one seeds, and Memphis...I am looking for them to do a lot of damage.

CM: How about Detroit this year, they have been up and down but playing well as of late with Hamilton back in the lineup. Do they have the right mix to go deep again in the playoffs?

BL: Hamilton deserves to be a starter. He makes everyone better, not just from scoring, but the defense he draws to help guard him. While a lot of people written off the Pistons, they are still a dangerous basketball team. They have weapons and experience. If they can integrate Allen Iverson, it will give them more fire power, but with the limited time left in the season, it’s been frustrating for the players and the fans.


CM: How much pride do guys like yourself that used to play for the team still have?

BL: For someone like myself or Isiah, Dumars, Vinnie Johnson, you have a bond with the organization and they are part of you ever. You want to see them be successful, and see them continue the tradition that you have set up for the team in winning. And, for the most part, over the years the pistons have (continued that tradition).

CM: You're so well known for the Pistons and the Bad Boys and physical play. Nowadays physical play isn't as tolerated. Have the fouls really changed that much from your day or have just the rules evolved to enforce them?

BL: A little of both, it’s a physical game. There are big guys and the court is shrinking everyday because guys get bigger. Some of the flagrant fouls they call and you’re like ‘what?’ It takes a little away from the game. They want more high flying and wild dunks for television, but at same time it is still a competition. You’re gonna have your moment when physicality happens, and you'll have your moments with pushing and shoving.


CM: You see this changing anytime soon?

BL: The legislation and the rules dictate that it’s not as acceptable as in the past so I don’t see it changing anytime soon.

CM: You often took on the role of an enforcer, is that something more teams could use today?

BL: My job was to be a good role player for some of the stars we had, rebound the basketball, play defense, and I also was the enforcement, the "sergeant at arms," if you will. If you’re messing with our guards, my job was to make sure you didn’t mess with our guards. At that time you didn’t get free layups. You’d have to earn it, and if you don’t want to get knocked down, you shoot jump shots.

CM: Did you ever imagine you would coach women's professional basketball and then win a title no less? What has that experience been like?

BL: Everybody said I’d be a coach when I was done playing, but I didn’t expect to be a women’s professional coach...because there was no league at that time. However, they play hard, they listen well, they want to succeed, they play physical, they play good team basketball, they do a good job. You can demand of them to be exacting, and they’ll get out there and give it their best shot.


CM: You hit quite a few jumpers during the All-Star Weekend shooting stars competition, how often do you still get out there and play?

BL: My range has diminished over the years but for 10-15 footers, the ball is still the same size, its not that hard.

CM: You mentioned some of your former teammates. How often do you stay in touch with guys like Isiah, who has had a rough couple of years, Joe Dumars and others?

I talked to Isiah a couple of times in the last couple of weeks. Rick Mahorn works for me as an assistant coach. Joe Dumars is at the Palace of Auburn Hills. People always ask me if I see Dennis Rodman. I don’t see Dennis Rodman. He’s out west somewhere.

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Thanks to Bill Laimbeer for taking some time out as I know he has been running a gauntlet of promotional interviews as of late.

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ESPN Sends Out Least Anticipated Email of All Time

Sports fans were greeted online today by this historical email which experts are calling the "Least Anticipated Email in the History of the Interwebs."

Comrade Becky

I caught the end of OTL's piece on Becky Hammon's decision to play for Russia following her snub by the US Women's Olympic Basketball Team.

I was ready to blast her. But before I did, I wisely decided I should probably get the whole story. Truth be told, I don't blame her decision. In fact, it seems she got a pretty raw deal.

From Coloradoan.com, "Hammon would play for U.S., if she could":

First of all, this was not Hammon's idea. Like most young basketball players, Hammon grew up very much wanting to play for Team USA. After the 2007 WNBA season, it looked like that would be a pretty sure thing. That season, Hammon averaged 18.8 points per game and led the WNBA in assists with five per game. She was named first-team all-WNBA. She finished second in MVP voting after leading San Antonio to its first playoff appearance in five years.

After being named to the 2007 West all-star squad, Hammon became only the second player in WNBA history to earn a starting spot on both the East and West teams during her career.

Yet, as the aticle points out, "In the (blind) eyes of USA Basketball, Hammon was not one of the 23 best American female basketball players out there."

"I'm the ultimate, ultimate patriot," [USA Coach Anne] Donovan told the media. "For me, it's about this country."

Apparently Donovan and other Team USA officials, the ones that caused this controversy with their hideous decision in the first place, expected the WNBA's best point guard to spend the Olympic break parked on her couch in San Antonio waving her miniature American flag, chanting "USA, USA!"

Someone needs to point out to Donovan and the rest of the group that loyalty is a two-way street.

Click the link above to rad the full article, and see the full OTL piece below.

Graphic Injuries

Math is hard. Hooray for Pictures!


Via The Sports Guy




Via With Leather

Via Awful Announcing

inspired by this rap graph thing. awesome.

All-Star Saturday Look-Alikes

As the teams are introduced for the Haier Shooting Stars competition, I thought to myself, "Hey, that Becky Hammon is kind of cute for a WNBAer." Ariel pointed out that she looks like Liz Hasselbeck.


She is now my favorite WNBA player and HHR's official favorite woman's basketball player.

BJ Armstrong still looks 10-years old.

When did Bill Laimbeer blow up like a wood tick?

The former Detroit Bad Boy bears a striking resemblance to superfan David Puddy.